they're just not that into you: 7 text behaviors that indicate you should aim elsewhere
"dating" has evolved (or not) so much though the past few decades or so. whereas, some people are still die-hard fans of going on actual dates and being courted and so forth, many people today have categorized this as being too "old fashioned". today, people text. they text to get into a relationship, they text to get outta a relationship, they text to have conversations (which arguably is not an actual conversation because conversations are verbal interactions between people but that's for another post). i'm not saying it's right.. but it is trending. so, in the spirit of "text-ologoy", here's a list of some of the most common signs that you may need to move on because they person you're into... is not that into you.
7). your text messages go unanswered.
some people will give their number out because they are genuinely nice, non-confrontational folks. however, unlike earlier time periods, getting someone's number does not mean that they are into you. if they aren't responding to your messages at all, they most likely are not into you. you may even be "black-listed" in their phone. so, take a hint and move around.
6). when they do reply, it's way after the fact.
you may think you are in the clear because even though they are taking forever to respond to your messages, at least they are still responding, right? wrong. taking forever to respond to a text message is just as bad as not responding to a text at all. basically, the person is letting you know that your conversation is not one they'd like to take part in. sending you messages that are choppy (and exceedingly late) is a way of letting you know you should find someone else to converse with besides them.
5). you're used to getting one word answers.
one word replies to text messages are a dead giveaway that someone is not interested, especially if the initial message(s) you sent them were much longer. you may sike yourself into thinking that one word answers are ok, but that's probably just because you really like this person and you've opted into accepting something as norm that is generally unacceptable. don't allow yourself to overinvest in someone who's really not into you like you are them, anyway. if they don't respect you enough to give you a complete thought, you may need to walk away without a second guess.
4). the conversations between the two of you are consistently inconsistent.
sometimes, the conversations may be "good", to say the least. but, they are not consistent. with this type of text behavior, you may find yourself having really good conversations...but you only communicate like three times a year? where's the logic in that? this is probably because the person you are so into has made you an "insurance plan". they only talk to you when they need to be reassured that they still got "it". whenever they have a falling out with the person they are really into, they then hit you up. your conversations may be great, but the intention behind them are bogus. don't allow yourself to be used. if things don't seem to be adding up between you two and how you converse, you may need to subtract yourself from the equation all together.
3). you may find yourself being subtweeted about something you sent in a text message (that didn't receive a response).
when the person you're into does not respond to your messages, don't keep sending messages. trust me, what they aren't sending back to you.. they are sending to the groupme via screenshot as they receive commentary from their friends who see just how "thirsty" or "irritating" you are. more often than not, when your reply to your messages may not come back to you in the form of a text. rather, you'll see it in the form of a subtweet (which is when someone is throwing "shade" at you without necessarily saying it's you on twitter). you don't have to take that type of treatment. take the hint and move along to someone who'll actually engage you, not play you.
2). you may get the occassional "who's this" text message if you try and call them (or if you text them and they've already deleted the feed) because your number isn't saved.
even if you are a millennial, numbers that are worth saving in the phone... are saved. therefore, if you find yourself on the receiving end of a "who's this" from the person you are so into, know that they have no intention of moving forward with you. longevity is so far off and not applicable that they don't even think enough of you to save your number (and in some cases, even your name) in their phone. don't waste time trying to come off as offended and opt into picking a fake argument with the person. move on. it is what it is.. and it ain't what it ain't. that's life, ya know?
1). they are rude to you via text, or very dismissive.
while most (if not all) of the aformentioned points were more passive aggressive, this one is more "in your face". if the person you are into is blatantly rude and disrespectful to you, that means they just don't care. they don't care about you as a person nor do they care about your feelings toward how they speak to you. disrespect is not (and should never be considered) a good foundation for any type of relationship. know yourself, know your worth *drake voice*. if they are dismissive toward you, dismiss yourself and go on to the next one. it's not the end of the world, although it may sometimes seem like it is.